A story by Michael, Across the UK
What challenge does this story focus on?
I was so excited to be pregnant! It took a while, but we couldn’t wait to be parents – I’d wanted to be a mum my whole life! My labour though was long and difficult. I ended up losing a lot of blood, and should have really had a blood transfusion, but refused!. But it got worse! She had group B strep, then pyloric stenosis and was basically starving so needed emergency surgery at 4 weeks old, and then got a post op infection. After this she was a very unhappy baby who rarely slept.
How has this challenge affected you?
Physically my body took a long time to recover from labour and the blood loss. Then for the first 4 weeks she didn’t really sleep as she was ill but undiagnosed – I was at the midwife / health visitor / doctors a lot! I felt really desperate as everyone told me she was fine and I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t coping so thought it was me! She was a lovely baby and I loved her. I didn’t realise how unwell I had become till I had my son, and then realised how motherhood should have been!
What has or is helping you to move forward with this challenge?
Our families were great – my mother in law came down every month to stay and help and my mum did too. I was so lucky to have amazing friends who just supported me. It was funny as when my son was born I felt immediatly different, like a fog had lifted and I was myself again, even though I hadn’t realised how ill I had been.
What have you learnt as a result of this challenge?
That I am stronger than I know, and that I have amazing friends and family that I can rely on.
How do you use this learning in your life now?
I try to look out for people, especially new mums, and the ones who say they are fine! I am much less judgemental and more compassionate.
What positive message would you like the reader to go away with?
This too will pass! I said that to myself almost constantly in the early days and it did get me through!